In which pirates and ninjas are discussed…
Finally, an end to the debate.
“Do you know how many recorded fights of ninjas vs. pirates there are in the history of the world? 3,421. Do you know that rumors exist of fights upwards of ten billion?
Do you know how many of those fights pirates won?
Zero.
There was one fight where pirates finally invented a ninja killing laser. They used it against the most powerful ninja of the time, and it shot a hole in his chest and caused him to exclaim in dismay, “wtf?!”
Yes, he used the “?!” combination.
At that point he killed almost as many pirates as Kaiser Soze killed Turkish people.
Before lunch.
Later that day, most pirates committed seppuku. The ninjas raised them from the dead, cut off their genitals, and killed them by squashing them under the hooves of hippopotomai to remove their honor.
That’s why the only pirates that exist nowadays steal computer software. Because ninjas don’t give a crap about computers. A ninja’s brain is worth 6 thousand computers.
As a side note, no ninja ever had the balls to EVER stand up to Kaiser Soze.”
